Survey #174 Response from Tammy s
| Which member(s) of your household support or contribute to your decluttering or organizing efforts, and how? (For example, “My husband keeps the home office and his workshop organized.”) | I live alone so it’s just me doing the cluttering but in therapy I learned I have inner kids and since I survived complex trauma they grew up learning to flee an abusive mom feeling terrified grab socks shoes snacks toys and throw in a bag. I survived abuse and neglect and lack so I feel sad and shame to see how I struggle with hoarding tendencies today even though there is no crises usually this is a trauma response triggered by fight flight freeeze and dissociation. For example I’ll find plastic bags of half eaten food in the back of the fridge or my backpack as if someone put them there but it was me . |
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| Which member(s) of your household frustrate, foil, interrupt, or otherwise complicate your decluttering or organizing efforts, and how? (For example, “My preteen child picks through the donation box to retrieve items even after we’ve reached agreement to get rid of them.”) | I do this myself put it in give away bag and take it back later |
| If you were to wish for one change of behavior from someone—or everyone—in your household with respect to clutter, what change would you wish for? (For example, “My preteen child picks through the donation box to retrieve items even after we’ve reached agreement to get rid of them.”) | I pray for healing and clarity my journey is frustrating. I find supportive people and therapists and groups to help. It’s interesting my sister who grew up in trauma with me is minimal and throws everything out. I want to be more like her but I struggle with fear of letting go and another trauma responses with adhd low executive functioning which paralyzes my decision process |
| Describe an item about which you have a strong disagreement with someone else in your household over whether or not it deserves a place in your home. (For example, “My mother’s 30 years of TV Guide magazines.”) | I disagree within myself I can’t let go of a book series I read with my dad 10 years ago because I bonded with him and struggle with my relationship with him now to bond complicated by his vascular dementia. Part of me wants to donate them and more parts of me can’t. |
| Here’s your chance to ask Gayle and Ed any question you’re curious about. It need not be related to this survey’s topic(s). If we think that your question—and our answer—might be useful or instructive to The Clutter Fairy Weekly audience, we’ll share them in an upcoming episode. | I enjoy the group every week My inner kids love y’all it’s informative safe fun interesting When can we have more trauma and adhd lessons and more interaction working groups ? Could we have a Facebook group to post pics and interact during the week? Thanks |
| Future topics | Adhd |
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